Dear Lord,
I need your help.
Maybe just an ear
to hear my thoughts.
I vowed to myself
to be careful with my heart.
Now I am letting
somebody rather special
begin to chip away
at the shield I have made.
It is not her
that is trying to get in,
it is me forcing her
into my heart.
I am not pushing
myself upon her,
rather allowing
my heart to weaken
to someone
I hardly know.
I know not
whether she feels
even the slightest bit
of affection towards me.
Perhaps it is the yearning
for my heart to cure
itself from the many
times it has been harmed.
Trying to fill
the empty space
with a love
that is not even known.
I have learned
from the past
that for me to love
and someone to love me
and for that love
to be so true
takes time
full of patience,
without jealousy,
or giving up.
I have also learned
to be careful,
that something can look
towards being so good,
but being blind with love,
ending up hurt in the end.
Why am I letting
this one get to me?
This is not natural,
at least to me.
It breaks the norm
that I have upheld.
All that I want
is companionship,
a good friend
to share affection,
and someone to also share
unconditional love.
Hopefully, I will
find this soon,
until then,
I will stay confused.
unpublished work: �copyright 1995 by Troy D. Walker
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